Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Finally...

...she's asleep and I'm not!  It's certainly been a long time since I've written.  Oh, only four weeks?  Well, we've lived enough life in those weeks that it feels like four months!  It is so hard for me to believe that Hayden Jingshu has only been with us for seven weeks.  I feel like I've known her for a very long time.  Every day is SO full.  In fact, nearly every day I think about blogging but by the time we get through the day and everyone is asleep, I am so tired that there is no way I could write anything you'd want to read.

So, what has happened in the last four weeks?  Where do I start?  Jingshu seems to love her new family.  All of us, not just some of us.  It only took about a week after we got home for her to decide that I'm not so bad, after all.  It might have helped that Darrell got sick and was in bed with a fever for four days!  He wasn't available and the other kids quickly resumed their normal social lives.  That means she was stuck with me.  That was a pretty rough week, but I'm thankful for the outcome. It took another couple of weeks for her to learn how groovy Logan is.  And that was VERY hard on him.  One day in the second week after we got home he decided he was DONE with her.  Or at least he wished he could be.  I told him that I understood how he felt and that he had a choice to emotionally "walk away" from her or keep trying.  He was ready to walk away.  I also told him that if he truly didn't care for her, it wouldn't matter to him how she felt.  The part I knew was that this love we have for her is not of our own making.  It is love from the Father.  So, even when he tried to "walk away," he couldn't.  Thankfully!  She now enjoys going to the pool with him, playing Legos with him, and giving him lots of hugs and kisses. 

She is learning English at a rate that is flat out scary!  She understands probably 80% of everything we say and speaks to us in English most of the time.  When she is very excited or angry she speaks in Mandarin.  I'm going to miss hearing that!  (Well, not the mad part, but the Mandarin.)  She says something new every single day! A few days ago, she needed to get past Parker and said, "Watch out, Parker!"  When she opens the pantry or refrigerator she says, "Let's see..."  Last night she came out with, "Close your eyes!"  One of my favorites is "...SO much!"  as in, "Thank you SO much," or "I love you SO much!"  I still watch her search for words, though.  Tonight we were video chatting with Parker on the computer and she said everything she could think of and kept searching for more words.  (BTW, the whole Parker-moving-to-college story is a blog post of its own, coming very soon.)

Because we knew she was not familiar with any church, much less a mega-church where she is a "celebrity," Darrell thought of several ways to slowly introduce her to the building and the experience.  It started with lunch with the Barnards in the FSM space, followed later in the week by a play date on the playgrounds.  Then, so that the music and the volume of the music wouldn't be a shock, Darrell took her to rehearsal.  Finally, we felt she might be ready.  The first Sunday that we went to church with her Darrell was the service pastor in the Worship Center, so he talked a little bit about our trip and showed a couple of pictures of Hayden Jingshu and our family in China.  Jingshu was so excited to see HER DADDY up on stage!  And then to see HERSELF up on the B I G screens was very thrilling!  The next week Darrell led worship in the Chapel.  She was amazed when she heard him play piano and sing; and then, he told the Chapel crowd about our trip and showed pictures of her and our family.  The third week, the sermon was all about adoption (with Brandon bringing the message only one week after returning home from his own 8000 Miles to Love journey)  and Darrell followed that by singing Steven Curtis Chapman's When Love Takes You In with pictures from both the Barnards' and Adcocks' trips to China.  I'm pretty sure Hayden Jingshu thinks church is all about her!  We'll see how it goes next week when there is no mention or pictures of her!

We've also started school.  Homeschool took on a new look at our house this year.  Even before we knew Hayden Jingshu was coming home, Darrell and I decided that McKenna and Logan would go to a school that meets once a week and I would teach at the same school.  We never felt led to change the plan, even when we figured out that this school would start less than two weeks after we arrived home from China.  A few days before school started, we asked a translator to explain to Jingshu that Mommy, McKenna and Logan would be going to school and that she could go, too, and that Daddy would go and stay with her for the whole day.  Or, she and Daddy could just stay home.  She wanted to go.  So, all five of us went to school the first day.  Three of us went into our classes.  One decided it was a bit too overwhelming. And the fifth was so wise to stay in the building with her, in a quiet corner where she could observe the kids coming and going and get used to the sights and sounds, until after lunch that day.  The next week they just stayed home together and I arranged for her teacher and her son to come to our house for a play date, bringing helium balloons to insure the instant bond!  We also had a play date with two other children from the class.  By the third Monday, she was ready to go.  Darrell went with her and stayed for a while, but was able to leave mid-morning because she was so content to be there.  She told us she had a fun day and looked forward to going back.  And I think she meant it until... (to be continued)

3 comments:

Suzy said...

Oh, how I look forward to Brandon's sermon next Sunday (at FBC's Benton campus we get the message a week later), but I wish we were going to hear Darrell sing & we'd get to see the slide show. In fact, I wish they were bringing it live to Benton!

Susie said...

Tracy! So good to hear how you all are doing! I've been thinking a lot about the Adcock family and longing to know how Jingshu is! I understand about not getting much time to blog... Lizzie's heart is completely repaired and we are working on her other issues. Emily is loving being a big sis and starts Kindergarten next week. Keep the posts coming!!!
Susie

MyFairLadies said...

Thank you, thank you for the update, Tracy - I loved seeing your family Sunday, and thought McKenna helping Hayden Jingshu was a beautiful addition to Brandon's message and Darrell's song. Prayed for you Sunday and Monday leading up to another day of school!

You are doing a great job, friend!